Once I realized people would judge me regardless, their opinions lost bearing on my sense of self-worth. What if I love the arts, design, cooking, and clothes? Will people think I’m gay? I am, so go ahead!
EmanTable said this so perfectly! God, the number of times in my life that I’ve pretended I didn’t like a song, denied being interested in a subject, refused to engage some issue, or squelched a sense of curiosity; all because I didn’t want someone to look and think “he so gay!” Well guess what, I AM gay!
In fact, just yesterday something happened that made me think maybe I might be making some progress. I recently got an iPhone, and I chose the 5c. Now most of my life, I would have avoided that. “A brightly colored Apple product? Oh he must be gay!” So buying it… baby step! But I have been somewhat self-conscious of it every now and then. Then yesterday I was out with a group of colleagues (Christians, and none of them know I’m gay). I pulled out my phone to take a group shot and somebody points out that my shirt matched my phone! That’s exactly the kind of thing that in the past would have made me cringe. “Oh god they’re gonna think I’m GAY!” But I just looked down and thought – hmmm, imagine that. They DO match. I thought it was pretty funny! Baby steps…
Glad I found EmanTable’s blog.